So Glad He Never Gave Up On Me

On this wonderful month of July, 31 years ago, God created one of his favorite and most successful creations outside of Christ himself…….ME. Okay, stop laughing……no seriously stop…it can’t be that funny. As my birthday swept to and fro, I couldn’t help but to process an examination of what the last 31 yrs of my life has looked like. It’s been a crazy roller coaster ride of good and bad memories, decisions I’m happy I made, others I wish I could re-do again, and some that still haunt me today. What always astonishes me is the thought that we are all hand picked and created from God himself. Life isn’t accidental, nor is it by chance. That become the major subject of this thought process.

We all have a past, and I have made many….many…..many mistakes throughout my life. I have caused pain in the lives of others, and to be honest I wouldn’t say my life’s resume is anything to brag about. As I meditated on a lot of my life choices I really began to appreciate the love that God shows when a child is born. Think about it, we are all born innocent and tend to take the lives we have been given and decide to go all kamikaze with them. Then we grow up at some point between 30 and 65yrs of age and calm down. Yet, God still blesses us with the opportunity to live in hopes that we will choose to follow him and develop that father / child relationship he created us for.

God isn’t prejudice of what we could turn out like, yet he still chooses to create us and gives us free reign over our lives….knowing most will choose to break his heart through our refusal to love him, or even grow up to deny his very existence. Now that is love. I want you to look over the decisions you have made throughout your life, pain you may have caused, choices you have made, yet God created you out of love because he believes in you. He really never gives up on us, even if we have given up on ourselves. What if we had a choice whether to create life based on the end result of what they do with it, how many people on this earth would have never been given the chance to live? Would you have been created? If I were to list the good and bad of my life on two sides of a paper I believe the bad would’ve out weighed the good, for only the last couple years of my life have been semi-applaudable. If mankind had a choice would I have been created?

I thank God all the time that he chose to bless me with the breath of life, knowing the paths I would take throughout life. It took me 29 years to realize who he was, and for some it will be the last minutes of their life before they really decide to hand their heart over to God. What blows my mind is how he will create that person and wait their whole life for those couple minutes of one on one affection, so he can hold their hand for all of eternity in his heavenly house. When I think back in life I can see all the different times God continuously reached out to introduce himself to me whether it was through friends, family, strangers, experiences, hardships, times of happiness, and so on. Yet with every smack of his hand he patiently waited to meet the son he gave life to 31 yrs ago. He lovingly waited 28 straight years watching me make decisions that caused him pain, walking down paths he tried so hard for me to avoid, choosing actions he wished I didn’t. In the end he never gave up on me and never stopped extending his hand for me to grab.

I thank you God for you have changed my life. There were times I chose to hold the hand of your enemy, and pretend like you weren’t there and yet you never gave up on me. You created me knowing my imperfections and loved me anyway. You have blessed me with a life I don’t deserve and have pulled me out of the hands of your enemy and a life of destruction that only leads to death. You have changed my heart and continue to make me a better man, husband, and father. It is because of you my children will grow up with your name tattooed on their hearts. It’s because of you that their morals with be strengthened, and it’s through you that my wife and I will be together until death do us part. I look forward to many more years together and the lessons you will put at my feet, and I pray that I will never let you down. Amen

How I found Freedom From Religion With Christ Part Two

Finding Freedom At Last

In my previous Blog I wrote about my experience growing up in organized religion and how this experience actually drove me away from God. For many…many…. years I felt like a spiritual orphan wondering around with this void in my heart where God used to reside. I was confused because I was raised only knowing God one way and if that’s what worshiping God was all about I wanted nothing to do with it. Years would go by and slowly and slowly my life began to distance itself from the morals that were once in my heart. In a lot of ways I feel like to protocol son. I feel like God allowed to try this life thing on my own by releasing me to the wolves as they say. Almost a decade would go by and one day I found myself attending a church with then girlfriend (now wife).

The funny part about God is he never really let’s go 100%, just like a parent who allows their children to fall so they learn to trust their advice, I believe God did the same so you learn to appreciate his guidance in the bible. The problem I faced was I was looking at a whole new way of belief systems that conflicted what I was raised to believe. So I finally said to heck with it and decided to purchase a bible and hit the restart button. You see I lived my life up to now going off of what others taught on the podium. I figured they were a ton more educated then me, and most religious leaders seem like they are far more advanced in life then what we’ll ever achieve. The problem with living life this way is you never quite come to a complete understanding of God, and where does the relationship begin when all the knowledge and faith you receive comes third party a couple times a week.

Imagine if you never met your parents (as some out there can relate to) and the only way you would come to learn about them is through random conversations from different friends and family members. For one, you never know if the information or stories are biased. For two, it their interpretations of that person’s experience with your parents. Lastly, do you ever really get a clear picture of who your parent’s are if they are random stories here and there from different people adding their spin on things? How can you know for sure, and how can you begin to build an appreciation and love for them through such a structure. On the other hand, what if they kept daily journals throughout their life documenting their every experience. How would this change your relationship and understanding of who they are? How wonderful it would be, and what a clearer picture would this help paint on who your parents really were.

This is what I eventually came to when I decided to start all over in my relationship with God. I decided to clear my head, heart, and mind of what everyone else around was saying about how I had to worship God, and what I should believe. I decided to go out and by a good study bible and read it for myself and allow the bible to educate me from the ground up of what God was all about. I never thought this lone decision would change my life in the way it has. I began with the book of Matthew and worked my way to Revelation, then went back and read the Old Testament. What an eye opener it was. I began to read about Christ first hand, and learned what kind of man he really was. I was shocked by how laid back and down to Earth he was. He didn’t go around casting judgment and spitting the fire and brimstone I had faced throughout my life. I would come to appreciate the loving kindness he bestowed to the people society had given up on in their day, like the poor that everyone choose to ignore, the sick society choose to discard and forget about, those whose lives were riddle with bad decisions and yet he was always there to help them understand that they were still loved and desired.

That spoke to me at a time in my life where I really did feel like an outcast. According to my past religious orientation I was excommunicated, and some of my closet family members choose to separate themselves permanently from me in the name of God. Even to this day I have family members who have never met my kids, and some I haven‘t talked to in over a decade…sad. As I read on I would get to the book of John that really laid out how much God truly loves and misses mankind. I started to realize that my walk with God was not one based on what organization I was a part of, on the contrary it was a one on one relationship that the bible was created for. It was about you and God and everything else was meant as a compliment, encourage, and develop your relationship with God and nothing more. When I got to the book of Roman’s I had truly found some of my greatest questions being answered.

I had still felt that I was so unworthy and that I was labeled for hell because of my standing in my organization. Then Paul began to teach how all men were imperfect, and no one would ever be perfect enough no matter what kind of good deeds they did, you could never earn your salvation. He would go on to teach how Christ’s death had covered all of mankind’s sin, and all one needed to do to start this wonderful journey from scratch was to have faith and believe in Christ and proclaim your repentance for your sins. You would always….always…always fall into sin throughout your life, but in doing so God would help your conscience grow and it would be followed by true repentance….followed by God’s grace and forgiveness. MAN……when I realized I needed no man to receive forgiveness from God and I could fall to my knee’s to restart my relationship with God, I literally fell to my knee’s and cried out to God. I felt like a million pounds of anxiety, depression, and unworthiness had finally been sand blasted off of my very soul. I would go on to read about our first congregations and what church was really about and how loving they were all throughout the world from Jerusalem to Asia Minor, there was nothing but universal love for one another. There wasn’t anything separating Christians. I would go on to learn so much more about God and who he was and develop a new found relationship that I never thought was possible. I found freedom in Christ, in learning that a relationship with him is far less stressful then what we are surrounded with today, there was really no strings attached to this relationship.

In doing so I found a church that mimicked what I would see in the New Testament. It had nothing to do with an allegiance to a organization, or a strict regiment of must do’s in order to be allowed to advance in your relationship with God. Instead I was able to wash Oak Creek Assembly of God against what the bible taught about how a proper church should look like and found a place that promoted free spiritual growth with no strings attached and I believe there are more like that out their. It just takes some time, prayer, and strong biblical foundation to have the patience to find them. The bible is one of the greatest gifts I have ever received from God and it has help me through some tough times, more then that it has helped me find God in a world riddled with confusion, pain, judgment, and cut through all of the clout that’s out there when it comes to God. I hope if you get anything out of this blog, it’s God has never changed…mankind has done a good job of painting layers over his originality. I truly hope if you can relate to my testimony and if other have caused you to feel as if you aren’t good enough for God or maybe the persona of a Christian has turned you away from anything to do with God to give him a chance. Pick up his book and let him get to know you on a one on one level and I bet you’ll be shocked to see how different he really is from what you thought. God Bless

How I Found Freedom From Religion Through Christ Part 1

Scars From The Past

As I grew up from baby on, I have always been exposed to the notion of God in some way shape or form. Like most, once I got a taste of freedom after I moved out I ran as fast as I could from the notion of religion or God. Why is that, why do most choose to distance themselves as far away from church as they can? What would you say stops you from wanting anything do due with religion. What causes those walls in your heart to raise once the word God, bible, church, Jesus, or anything of religious nature enters those ears of yours.


Why is it that causes most people to look at the bible like it's a pyramid scene? In a sense I would have to agree with this last statement. Like many reading this I was raised in religion, we liked to knock on your doors every Saturday like clock work. Here's what drove me out, and mind you I loved my organization and it was entrenched in every aspect of my life. As I grew up I found myself always going toe to toe with my pastoral staff when it came to biblical teachings and their dogma attached to it.

I began to see one major problem with organized religion, it's all about the organization and its rules, dogma, traditions, theories, etc. It's their leaders that are put on God like pedestals, and their rules that are on top of biblical teachings.  It's about power, and nothing more. In truth God and Jesus come second to religion all together. As my imperfections manifested themselves throughout my life I faced a literal tribunal which encompassed a long table, my parents, and panel of the congregations elders. They would present the sin I did and begin an array of questions in an effort to drain every nitty gritty detail to see if I was repentant or not. I would then leave, only to be called back in a presented with a sanction that could be as little as a verbal scolding, loss of a privledge, or flat out excommunication.

In order to be viewed as religiously pure I had to show traits of repentance over a certain time period. After such a time and another meeting with the elders I would be deemed “reproved” and an actual announcement would be communicated to the congregation. Crazy hey? So my salvation was judged and determined by other imperfect men that sinned just like me, and viewed their roles no different then a typical politician. The message was allegiance to the organization first while following God according to their rules. I never looked at my walk with God as a one on one thing, instead I looked at my walk with God as a chore list of items I had to continuously submit to in order to reap visual and verbal applause from my congregation and their leaders. To be honest I found worshiping God to be the most aggravating, stressful, painful experience of my life. I felt like I was never good enough, and in the end I felt spiritually abused to be honest.

This is where I think a lot of people can relate and why so many people are turned off to the notion of God and anything to do with Church. I once asked my cousin to join me at church and she wanted to, but her fear was by coming she was committing herself to an organization. I don't blame her. Before I settled down at Oak Creek Assembly of God I went through a lot of churches. I just wanted to show up, worship God a little, learn something new, and be surround by others of like mind. Instead I would sit there being bombarded by sales pitches to join their organization. I would see pastor's who ran their church more like a personal kingdom rather then a place of spiritual growth.

I was ready to give up on God. I had experienced more pain, strife, anxiety, stress, sadness, and just plain out mental abuse in the name of God then anything, and I mean anything, then I had ever experienced. Let's be honest religion has even found a way to separate Christianity itself. They read the same bible and pray to the same Jesus, and yet it's not about being a Christian...it's about being a Catholic, Baptist, Pentecostal, Lutheran, Methodist, etc. Organization first, bible second. So what changed you might ask? After all isn't this a Christian blog? Isn't this to help me come one step closer to God and some day step into a Church? You would be correct, and this is because I found religious freedom through Christ. This is what we are going to cover in part 2

I Refused To Loose Faith

Hello everyone…it’s been a while since my last blog due in part to a little something called writers block. I’m more of a fan of quality over quantity, and the very fact you take time out of an already busy day to read what I have to say means a lot to me. In no way would I ever want to loose this privilege. So what insight will I write on today you might ask, and in reply I would have to say sadness. You see over the last two years I have really grown to appreciate the big man upstairs ssssooooo much in part to the relationship I feel I have been able to create with him. Now, in no way am I writing to toot my own horn and I promise in the end my purpose should come together…..hopefully. In creating this relationship I have seen certain changes come about in both my moral system, the way I view life, and what I consider a purpose for my life.


I have noticed that along my personal journey to learn more about God that it has transitioned more into a lifestyle in which I find myself constantly analyzing my actions and how they stack up biblically. I have found that not only has this journey changed me as a person morally, but it has also changed the way I look upon others in life. I am starting to feel obligated to remove my focus from myself and in turn live life for others because of love I constantly see in the foot steps of Christ. I have noticed that my passion in life, in the simplest terms, is how can I live for God on a daily basis….how can I do my part to help reverse all of the pain, hypocrisy, and falseness that has destroyed the image of God among ssssooooo many people.

This is where the sadness comes in. As I look around in my everyday adventures I just don’t see God in our society anymore…it’s like the idea of God has diminished from America. I mean not even two decades ago it was a norm for families to still pray together for dinner, neighborhood churches were still filled, and morally one could get arrested for using certain words on TV…..heck divorce was still taboo. You would never hear a curse word on public TV or Radio, and just 40 yrs ago Elvis was being sweated for shaking his hips. What has happened to us, when did we give up on our moral system and say to heck with it.

Call me over the top, but it blows my mind as I listen to secular radio as hear the never ending barrage of sex, drugs, and language our youth hears on an hourly basis. Public TV is just as bad, I challenge you to find a show that in some way does promote sex before marriage, experimentation with drugs or alcohol, defying parental guidance, divorce, adultery….I think you get the jest of it. Most of these acts are performed by underage actors for our children to repeat. Now I only speak for myself, but to me its like the bible is loosing a battle that has spiraled to far out of control, and that’s where my heart has felt so burdened lately.

It is a wonderful feeling to be apart of a church where you can see God actively working in the lives of others, and seeing more and more lives transformed, but outside of those walls and in everyday life I feel as if society has swept the bible and it’s teachings under the rug. My prayers have changed because just as Moses prayed on behalf of millions, Samuel on behalf of nations, and Jesus for us, I believe one man’s faithful prayer for a nation can still be heard. I have come to a peace in my heart that every aspect of the bible is 100% true ……. every story, every miracle, and every prophecy, from page one of Genesis to the last word in Revelation. While a lot reading this may not agree with my last statement, I have come to a point where my faith is so strong in the word of God that, in all honesty, there lingers no doubt.

Because of this, I will continue to pour my heart out to God asking for a revival in every beating heart alive today, because I believe my prayers count and that my faith holds weight in the hands of God almighty. I will continue to ask for opportunities to pour love into the lives of others in the same way he has poured into mine. I will continue to pray that I never cause any to feel judged, or oppressed through my actions, and that I may live humbly in an effort to peel away the layers of distrust so many have built up when they hear the word bible or God.

I believe it is never to late to change a society and that everyone, no matter your status, can have an affect on those around them simply by choosing to. Because of this I will continue to challenge those reading these bloggs to look around your community and give back to those who have never been blessed. It is though our acts of earnest kindness with no strings attached I believe God will open up doors. God Bless

Want to Hear The Crazy Story Of How My Wife and I Hooked Up

Every morning I awake to the sounds of a scrambled old alarm clock sitting next to my bed, and every morning I hit the snooze button about 5 times before I am able to turn around and open my eye's. It is at this moment in my daily tradition that I realized how blessed I truly am as I gaze upon one of the most beautiful creations ever hand crafted by God himself....my wonderful wife. This month is going to be our four year anniversary of marriage and eight year anniversary of being a couple. Eight years, thought it may not be long to many of you old timers, it is a long time to be with a person. I think what makes our story so special is how we made it this far, and vital the role God plays in transforming us as Husband and Wife

So lets go back eight years as you come to a beginning of our relationship that was riddled with chaos and often ended in our traditional weekend break ups (flower shops pulled a pretty dime off of me for our first couple years of dating).You see, when we first met I wasn't what some would call a God fearing man, and my wife was entering into the typical “I just turned 21 phase”, which is often followed by a Rolodex of bad decisions. One of my best friends was working with my wife at the time and decided she was going to hook up her two favorite people even though Hannah and I hadn't met nor spoke before, and how would she go about doing this...in a club of all places, (don't judge me..this was in my B.C days). So there I am being introduced to my future wife to be. Now what I didn't know was my friend was talking me up and making me out to look like mighty Don Juan, and I had no idea. I thought Hannah was just a normal friend of a friend with no strings attached. So what does any good person do, try to hook this nice girl up with a good friend of mine. You heard it right, I tried to hook this girl who would go on to be my future wife to be with a friend of mine. See what happens when people don't communicate with each other!!!!!

If I would of known this hotty bagotti was there to meet mu-ah, do you think I would've made that mistake...that's a negative. So my first blind date with Hannah was me ignoring her and passing her off to a good buddy of mine...burn. The night would end with grabbing a burrito with my match maker Tia, and Hannah. This is where the sparks would begin. Later we would re-do another date in which I forgot what she looked like from our previous dinner three weeks previous , played liked Joey giving the “How you doing face” to every blond I ran into until I finally we met again....but...that's another story in itself. Now you would think it would be poetry from there, but in fact our relationship would go on to become a roller coaster ride of weekly break ups, massive emails of apologies until one day my wife, who was raised as a Christian all her life, realized she had drifted off of a very vital road in which she used to walk hand in hand with God. She realized that she had not listened to how her parents raised her, and ignored the very book she held so dear to herself. She made one of the hardest choices in her life...to end our relationship. What made it worse is we were engaged at this time.

I was going to church with her, but I was only going to make her happy. When we would get home all my Christianity stayed in the car. For Hannah she had come into a hard cross road in her life. She loved me to death, but she loved God even more and did not want to create a family with a man who couldn't be the spiritual leader she needed. You see she was starting to get that relationship with God back that she had lost over the years and wanted a man that could be king of her household, a man that would complement her desire for a Godly family. After three years dating the hammer came down and the break up was u..g...l...y.., man that girl knows how to break up, broke a man down.

Now here I am all by myself, ticked off blaming the whole thing on her, because lets be real I'm perfect..J/K. Something interesting would begin to happen, you see God doesn't waste any seed planted in a person's heart no matter how deep that seed has to go.  I would find myself missing church on Sundays, and one day, on my own accord.  I began to seek out God out by going to church. I was beginning to develop a relationship with God that I never thought was in me, and this time it had nothing to do with Hannah. It was during this time that I got some of the best advice on relationships. I would call my old pastor to vent on what I felt went wrong. After listening to me Hannah bash, she would go on to tell me how she never heard me mention any of my faults. She mentioned that when a person concentrates on fixing whats wrong with them and focuses on their own faults vs pointed out their partners faults, the other seems to follow suit since their left with looking at themselves in the mirror.

I had never missed a women in the way I missed Hannah. For me relationships were a dime a dozen, and I think a lot of my ex's, unfortunately, would agree to that. It would be almost seven months of not hearing from Hannah, not seeing her, I mean nothing. I had finally came to terms that my relationship with Hannah was come to an end, and after seven months my friends had talked me into going out for a blind date. Now I know God had to have a game plan when it came to us, because guess who shows up out of the blue after all this time on the day that I have a blind date. You guessed it right....Hannah. The freaky part is we had no mutual friends, she had her people, I had mine. I came out and man...she was looking finer then ever. Now you know since a brotha was single I was in reconstruction mode myself, after re-sculpting this already chiseled body.

What was different is that we both had time to individually create our own walk with God and truly do some house cleaning of the soul. We had missed each other so bad, but had many things about each other we could not put up with again. We would act as if we met for the very first time in laying down ground rules on things we absolutely had to have to move forward, such as: communication, true godly standards, patience, thinking of the other before themselves, and that we would walk hand in hand in helping each other create a family structure that made sense. It was a hard slow road to get back what was so damaged. My pastor once said if you live life concentrating on the needs and desires of your spouse over yours, and they are to practicing such love you can never go wrong. Hannah and I are a testimony of this. We have been back together four years since that big break up and I can honestly tell you that we haven't had a major argument or went to bed angry with one another in FOUR YEARS. We make sure that everyday God plays a role in our lives and that we serve him as a family.

As a couple we make sure each night ends with us praying over our children and ourselves as a couple. We make it an effort to end our nights in scripture. Ministry is a vital part of our relationship, and whats so important is that we make sure that any action we make, we make as a family. We are equals in this house. I am so blessed to have a wife that is the definition of self sacrifice. Every day I come home to a wife with a smile on her face and arms wide open. She is a women who lives life with the intention to spread more love then her little petite body can hold, and to be honest she has made me a better man in the process. I am blessed..I am Blessed,,,,and happy anniversary baby XOXOXO.

Dear God

I’m sitting here tonight after a wonderful Sunday filled with some good quality time together, and I find myself wanting more. God I must admit I often find myself wondering if I have made you proud since your creation of me 30 years ago, or have I taken this life for granted. I wish I could go back to my first taste of freedom at 18 years of age and start off life in service to you, instead of concentrating on my own desires and needs, I would of chosen a different route, a life of pure service to your kingdom and to your will. It’s hard now that I am married with family, college, and a full time job to see how I can create such a lifestyle today, but I know with your guidance nothing is impossible.

As I sit back on my couch writing this I can’t help but to think of some of my friends and family who haven’t had the privilege of learning about you, or live their lives as if you really don’t exist. If only I could lay a figure on their hearts and give them a taste of what it feels like to have you in their life. God, I often fear loosing my family and those I care about so much to our adversary, and hate how he has blinded so many in this world. It almost feels as if your name has disappeared from our households, when not to long ago you were a name at the dinner table where families would pray together, and churches were packed. It hurts to see you disappearing from our nations moral system as a thing of the past., a fad, and old school way of thinking.

It breaks my heart to see so many children, so young, that are starting so early in life to fall into the snares that I would only see teenagers struggle with later in life. Hearing about 12 year olds who are ready having multiple sex partners, or already experimenting with drugs and alcohol. What blows my mind is how open parents are to promoting these lifestyles to their children with no fear of the outcome. My hear is filled with fear to see how our youth will grow up to raise their children. So many parents refuse to live by the higher standard required of us to lead our family, by example, to make sure our youth grows up better then we choose to. I guess I can’t blame our youth when they are surrounded 24/7 by sex, drugs, and the promotion of rebelling found in everything from their music, clothes, to their television shows. I remember the days when we had culture, and at least public TV used to ban cursing, nudity, and vile drug use. The days of leave it to beaver are dead.

God, our society needs you in the worse way, America needs you,. I pray God that you never give up on us and beg that you never turn you back from us even though we deserve it to the umpteenth level. Where did we go wrong God? Why have we turned out so vile as a nation? I pray for our family structures God because with out it this nation is doomed. You know what really hurts God, watching so man of your Christian followers sit back and choose to do nothing more then claim a title, go to church, and maybe attend some extra church activities. I must admit I am not really any better then most, but I try God….I try to find ways to help others see you for who you are.

This world would look so much different if more and more Christians choose to follow your sons words of loving their neighbor like themselves. What would this world look like if half of the Christians on this planet decided to gather together and serve their communities like Christ served his. I don’t think our nation would look like it does today, and I believe more people would understand how much you truly love us if we showed people more. I promise you God that my family and I will live life with our eyes looking to bless others instead of waiting for you to bring the people to us.

I miss my family God and hate that we have been separated in your name, it’s almost an oxymoron. It has been almost a decade since I last hugged my grandmother, or heard one of my grandfathers funny jokes. I pray that before my grandparents die I will be able to enjoy one last meal with them. It’s sad because the man they raised and saw walking down a life riddled with chaos, is so different today and I owe it all to you God. I thank you for opening my eye’s and heart to you and never giving up on me, even though at times I gave up on you. It’s because of your love and forgiveness in my life that I find it hard to hate those who at times deserve that place in my heart. How could I ever come to you and pray for your mercy if I refuse to live by your example.

At times I find myself yearning for the return of your Son, but at the same time there are so many whose names haven’t been inked in the book of life yet, and the thought of any going to Hell is unimaginable. I will say though, I can’t wait for the day I wake up to an Earth rid of sin and imperfection, a world where your name is worshipped in every house, a world where suffering is a forgotten subject, a world that never understands what it means to feel hungry or fear for your safety. It is almost unfathomable to picture a world of equality and peace, where everyone loves one another and murder, sickness, and morning are never heard again. To live in a world where doctors would be out of a job, and jails don’t exist. I can only sit back and dream, and I also know I may not be able to change the world on my own, but I can choose to sit back and do nothing. I promise I will never choose to nothing again God. Thank you for letting me ramble to you God and I will talk to you tomorrow.

Do You Eat Your Lunch, Or Do You Share It

As we start off the year I’ve been doing a little self review, a little grade report on where I feel my walk with God is in comparison to where I would like it to be. In doing so, I’ve sat back to think where I was two years ago when I made my covenant with God. I asked myself, “Am I stronger then where I was two years ago? Can I say have grown, and have had a greater impact on where I was before”. Then came the hard question, have I plateaued in my walk from where I began? As I thought about this, I would have to agree; I was a little more disciplined and driven in my walk with God two years ago. In the last two years I have become comfortable in my place with God, and in turn, I believe I have hindered the work God could truly do in my life.


I find myself often praying and asking for opportunities to serve God, asking him guide me to people who I could offer prayer for, or people who I could help draw closer to him. As I review this last year, I didn’t find myself to active in these areas; often this blog was the only work I put in for God. Last Sunday one of our Pastor’s gave a talk about God the provider. It was in this talk that he asked the question, “do you eat your lunch or do you share it”. The whole basis of his talk was touching on the example of Jesus feeding 5,000+ people because of two fish and a couple loaves of bread a little boy gave to his apostles, which Jesus was able to multiply. It was about living life for others instead of living life for ones self. I must admit I left that sermon with a whole new look at my year, convicted you can say.

As I ended my night reading in the Book of Luke, I would find God’s word complimenting the very sermon I heard, as Jesus gave the parable of The Good Samaritan in Luke 10:25-37. There was a theme I began to see in Jesus’ desires for mankind. In the parable a expert in the law asks Jesus, “what must I do to inherit eternal life” (a question I am always looking to answer). Jesus asks him, “What is written the law?” The answer was, “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind’[c]; and, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself”. It was the last the five words that stuck out to me and ties into that Sunday’s sermon. In fact, this is the theme that Jesus shows by example and continuously teaches to anyone who will listen; to love others more then you love yourself.

As a Christian I know there is so much more then putting money in an envelop that I can do to help bless others in the way I ask God to bless me and my family on a daily basis. I know there are people in my demographic who hurt, and have it far worse then I have ever experienced. I know there are people who have never been served, but lived life as the servant. I know there are people sitting in hospitals with no one to sit next to them, or families who could use a little tender loving care. What if for once I lived life outside of my world and choose to focus my time on the needs of others. I no longer have the excuse of saying, “I could do more if I had the money”. What if everyone reading this took one day of the month and dedicated it to someone else’s needs? What if everyone reading this looked into their excess and decided one day to look for someone else to bless, maybe it’s digging into the closet and blessing someone with some clothes we take for granted.

I see now why even though I have prayed for opportunities none have come, it’s because I have never gone out and looked. All these days of prayer thinking it was up to God to bring the people to me, instead, I should have been going out and letting God bring me to the people. People….we are so blessed as a nation We take it for granted the roof we have over our heads, clothes on our backs, and food in our stomach. Sure we may not be making the money we want, or drive the care we would like……but you have a car, something half of this world lacks. I truly feel as if God has shaken me down for my heart has never been so inflamed while my body is buzzing at the thought of how I can finally take the scriptures I read every night and actually put them to use. How I can finally help bring the love of God to life.

People are always saying how they would like to change the world, Christians are always saying how they would like to help people see and experience the love of God. Here is how we can, by sacrificing our time and going out and looking at where we can give back to others what we have been so blessed to take. This weekend I looked in my closet and was able to fill an entire hefty bag to it limits with clothes I no longer where. In my closet I found multiple pairs of in good shape shoes I no longer where. As I drive to work I always see the homeless, and those that you can see are entrenched in poverty. I plan on passing on some blessings. This year we should be doing okay in the tax return area, I think I’m going to walk around and look for someone to treat to a nice warm meal.

Every second Saturday their is a ministry called City on the Hill that caters to those homeless and in financial distress. I think my wife and I are going to be a servant for them and help make them feel VIP for a day. There is a cancer ward in our local hospital; I think my wife and I are going to help bring a smile to some children who haven’t smiled for a while. I get it now, I understand what Jesus was showing as he traveled healing the sick, feeding those who were hungry, and showing love to those whose communities outcasted them. What if every Christian put down their own agenda once a month, and served their community or lived each day looking for the chance to bless someone…..do you think communities would begin to see God in a different light? Could we possibly even change the way a community looked? Change your world, you can make a difference, and it doesn’t cost a thing.

Should He Lead Again

The other day there was a show on TV on Ted Haggard. It was a special about his familiy's attempts to start a new church in Colorado Springs. For those not familiar with him, he was the senior pastor at New Life Church in Colorado, and was a prominent leader in the National Association of Evangelicals. Four years ago he was caught up in a scandal which linked him to a male prostitute, and drugs. It was a scandal that rocked America, and had a grand affect on the Christian world.

In the end Ted Haggard was removed from his pastoral and leadership roles and was torn apart in the media. Before his fall out, he was the face of Christianity on TV. Before I would come to know who he was, I would see him on TV any time they needed a spokesperson to speak on behalf of Christians. Four years later, he has decided to re-establish his role as a pastor which brings the debate….is this okay, should he be allowed to hold this position and lead people on their spiritual journey?

This is something my wife and I discussed as we watched the show. First, let me point out that no one has the right to point the finger at someone’s mistakes or faults for we all have skeleton’s in our closets that we would rather die then share with others. Secondly, everyone deserves forgiveness for one’s past, no matter how crazy it was, that’s the whole premise behind repentance. As I watched I could agree with some of his argument’s, the main one being that church should be a place for all people of all backgrounds. It should be a place not just for the righteous, but a safe haven for those who earnestly need a helping hand, freedom from any bondage they seek release from.

At one point the media asked if homosexuals were welcome to his new church, which he responded yes. You know what’s sad, I thought church was a place for all. Last time I read the bible there was no difference in sin whether you are sleeping around with people of the opposite sex, or people of the same sex. Seriously, I don’t understand why homosexuality is placed on such a high pedestal, when biblically it’s no different then lying in the eye’s of God. What blows me away, is how the same people picketing against homosexuals, with all their judgment and hate think their any holier then those they target.

Ted would go on to discuss his out casting from the very church he helped found, and his new found view as a pastor that Christianity is all about love for others and accepting them not based on their background, but for the people they are. This is what has bothered me about this wonderful religion that Christ died for, and in scripture lived as a perfect example for us. So many Christians, and churches have lost track of what we are here for, even though we teach about it every Sunday……the love of our fellow man. Aren’t we all broken? Are we all imperfect, don’t we all fall short of God’s glory every day? Then why are we so quick to cast the shadow of judgment on people in their weakest moments. As Christian’s aren’t we suppose to be the one’s anyone can come to and find love and feel acceptance in a world so quick to cast judgment and hate?

I mean wasn’t it Jesus that showed this as he sat and ate with the very people the religious elect of his day rejected like prostitutes, tax collectors, the poor, the sickly, and so on? Wasn’t it God who also showed this as he called a man named Saul, who was their version of Hitler, as he was on his way to slaughter thousands of God’s own people. Wouldn’t Paul go on to write ¾’s of the New Testament. These are the stories we read and preach about everyday of the year, and yet we are so fast to push people struggling with sin out of our sights, or turn our back to those opposite to our belief system. Now, I’m not saying this all of Christianity…but it is a virus that has certainly pitched it’s tent throughout our churches.

In the end my wife and I agreed that a pastoral role is one of the most important positions a person can hold. It is a position of influence in which you will be looked at almost God like by your congregation members. You are the person they will turn to in their times of need, their times of hardship, their times of joy. You will be a person they turn to for guidance in some of life biggest decisions. You are to be a leader and an example, and a life of a pastor is self sacrificing because you are the example your followers will imitate. I think once Ted Haggard fell from grace he relinquished that privilege to represent God as a pastor forever.

As you read through the bible you will see many people who were brought to power by God himself and choose to go against his rules. Even though some would go onto repent, none would ever have the privilege to lead God’s people again. I think it’s wonderful Ted’s wife stayed with him and his children still support him. I think it’s sad his church closed their doors on him and his family, instead of surrounding him we he needed them the most. We are all imperfect and many of us come to God in prayer quite regularly asking him for forgiveness. Let us pour out the same love for others that we seek in private and change the perception that has plagued us for so many years. I encourage all to practice the same love that Christ gave to the world. I feel blessed that I was surrounded with the people I was, and I found Oak Creek Assembly of God. It took me many years to finally make a step in the right direction, and so many times I deserved rejection, but they never gave up on me.

Instead, I would receive constant calls of motivation and encouragement. My fellow brothers would make sure to immerse me in their presence, and never gave up when I tried to distance myself so I could go back to my old ways. I was as bad as they get, and I thank God all the time for the people in my life that loved me more when I deserved it the least. It was that never ending love that has helped me to be the best husband, father, brother, son, and friend I could ever be.

The Greatest Decision Ever made



Well, we took vacation from our series looking at how one could begin the process, in quiet, of coming to God one step at a time. First, we looked at how no one is perfect. I think this is where many find themselves looking in the mirror thinking they have to come into church already put together. This would be false, it takes time and no one really reaches that pinnacle in their life where they can say they have worked out every imperfection in their soul. Secondly, we looked at the myth behind God and how over the millenniums his image has become so obscure it is hard to tell who God is and what he is really about. We looked at who he is and how he is no different then a father seeking to re-kindle a relationship with his children. We then looked at one of our first foot steps towards meeting God, prayer….and how this is where it all begins. Prayer is your own personal one on one time to open your heart and pour it all out, put all your questions and feeling on the table….just you and God, no one else. Sometime in your journey, if you choose to continue on, you will come to a cross road in your heart were your soul and conscious will demand change, and we discussed facing your cross road. Lastly we left off with the scariest and most uncomfortable steps in your walk with God….CHURCH. We left off by reading my testimony on how I felt the very first time I stepped into a church, and I believe you will be able to relate on your first visit as well.

Every year around this time people throughout America tend to sit back and ponder on the year before. In doing so we will often make subtle promises of change in our hearts….goals we hope to accomplish, or bondages we hope to overcome in this New Year before us. For some it’s loosing weight, for others it quitting smoking, or getting a better job. The only problem is within weeks or best months we tend to fall back into our old habits and in turn fail to live up to what our heart desired. The funny part is the extent we will often go to fulfill these goals, like spending hundreds on gym equipment, supplements, and personal trainers to reach our desired weight. Maybe it tossing the cigarette pack aside and paying double for nicotine replacements, or enrolling in school to have an advantage in the job market for that dream job. In the end we have this wonderful gym equipment collecting dust, 12 boxes of nicotine gum going stale, and three college courses under our belt with a new debt of $2-$3,000 with no intent of going back.

So this brings us to one of the greatest decisions, and best new years resolutions one can partake of. It is also one of the biggest steps you will ever make in your journey to God…..the decision to give it all to God, the decision to commit your heart, your mind, your body, your morals, your life from this day forward to him. You see this is the goal of God’s word and the true meaning of what it’s all about…utter repentance of one’s past and dedication to one’s future. At some point if you really give the big guy a chance, if you decide to open your heart to prayer, if you decide to pick up his word the bible, if you decide to walk out of your comfort zone and enter into a church to take your worship to the next level, at some point in your spiritual journey your heart will move you to this very decision. This is what Jesus died for, this is why God himself sent his son for, this is what Christianity is all about, this is why I write this blog and spend my nights on my knees praying for you reading this today……..to help you come to the point where you fall in love with God so hard, nothing else makes sense then to give God your all.

The best part of this new years resolution is unlike all the others you have made and failed on your own accord, this is one you’re not alone in, this one is out of your hands, and this one only requires words from your mouth that are true in your heart. For some, you aren’t ready yet and that’s okay, for some it’s time. Paul said it best in Romans 10:9-10

If you declare with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. 10 For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you profess your faith and are saved. 11 As Scripture says, “Anyone who believes in him will never be put to shame.”[e] 12 For there is no difference between Jew and Gentile—the same Lord is Lord of all and richly blesses all who call on him, 13 for, “Everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved.”[f]

If in your heart you feel it is time and you want to leave your past in the past and start your year off with a clean slate in the eye’s of God, if you feel in your heart that from here on forth you want your life to be a life that walks with God hand in hand then please use this prayer as an example to make your own:

"God, I recognize that I have not lived my life for You up until now. I have been living for myself and that is wrong. I need You in my life; I want You in my life. I acknowledge the completed work of Your Son Jesus Christ in giving His life for me on the cross at Calvary, and I long to receive the forgiveness you have made freely available to me through this sacrifice. Come into my life now, Lord. Take up residence in my heart and be my king, my Lord, and my Savior. From this day forward, I will no longer be controlled by sin, or the desire to please myself, but I will follow You all the days of my life. Those days are in Your hands. I ask this in Jesus' precious and holy name. Amen.

You have not only been forgiven of your past, and washed clean of all the skeletons in your closet, your name has been entered in what is called God’s book of life. Believe it or not at this very moment in heaven there is rejoicing because of you:

Luke 15:10 - I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.”

This is truly the first step of many to come, as you continuously grow in your relationship with God you may be moved to get baptized one day. There are so many avenues to a spiritual journey and my heart is ecstatic that I was able to share in the greatest prayer in your life. I will warn you that life as a Christian is a hard decision because Satan is always on the hunt to win back a soul he has lost, and never sleeps in his endeavors. Remember this prayer isn’t a one way ticket heaven for if a person chooses to turn their back on God and go back to a life rattled with sin, essentially you are voiding out the very prayer you said today. You will always fall short and stumble into sin, sometimes daily, just remember that God is a merciful God and is open to your prayers of repentance. This is your relationship with God, this is your journey, where it goes, and where it ends up is up to you. I pray this year will be one the best years of your life, and God will shine brightly from your heart. God Bless

Making This Holiday Count



Every year the world enters into the Christmas season. It’s a time of joy as if it’s un-American to walk the streets without a smile on your face. It is a time when you will see strangers helping out one another in ways we don’t get to see throughout the year. It’s a time when arguments seem to be brushed aside temporarily so that festivities can prevail. It’s a time of the year where mankind seems to open up their hearts and love one another in a way we lose track of throughout the pages of the year. I truly love the Christmas season for it brings out the best in people, and it seems like society awakens in a way we rarely get to see after January 1st.

My favorite part of Christmas is how for one month, just one month, I get to see Christ get his share of praise that often gets clouded out as the days go on. For me Christmas is a reminder and a refreshment of how wonderful God truly is. John 3:16-17 says it best:

For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him. (NIV)

For so many years I took this holiday for granted and only looked forward to it because it gave me some time off of work, getting a present I wanted, and getting my Spanish food fix for the year. Now, For me Christmas is a reminder of one of the greatest gifts God could have ever gave mankind,,,,his son Jesus. I mean God could have easily wiped Adam and Eve out and started from scratch with mankind until we got it right, but he didn’t. He allowed us, you, and me to be created with a free will to make choices on our own accord. He would bless us with his son to give his life so that mankind could be forgiven for the mistakes of our forefathers and be able to finally come to him with no strings attached. This was something mankind had never experienced before, the ability to openly come to him one on one. It is awesome to have a month where Jesus us gloried everywhere you look.

We as a nation are so blessed to live in a country that comes with so many freedoms and privileges, but it’s the holidays that open my eye’s to the suffering of others. I want to encourage those reading this to please open your hearts to those around you. There are so many people out there who won’t share the same joys we will this holiday. There are families with children that won’t have presents under the tree this year. People will spend their Christmas sitting in shelter’s hungry while you and I are filling our stomachs with wonderful dishes of food. There will be people sitting in hospitals watching loved ones in pain, while you and I end the night in laughter. There will be people sitting alone with no one to share this wonderful season with, while we are sitting with family and friends. We are all strapped financially this year but I pray that all reading this will in someway look for the opportunity to bless someone this holiday and show them what the Christmas sprit is all about.

I love this holiday and my heart often grows heavy as December 25th comes and goes. I miss the glowing houses, the joy and love people share with one another. I miss watching people go out of their way to help others as they do during Christmas. I miss seeing enemies become friends for the sake of the holiday, or even the crabby becoming happy. Most of all I hate seeing the nativity scenes removed and watching Jesus fade into the shadows until next year. If only every month were Christmas I think society as a whole would be so much more civilized. Just remember this holiday to set some time aside and thank God and Jesus for the greatest gift mankind has ever received, his sacrifice, and lets not loose track of what Christmas is truly about.

I hope all have a wonderful and blessed holiday, and if your one of those going through a ruff time this holiday I pray that someone would enter your life this week and shed a little light into your dark day. Just remember there is a God up there watching you and he loves you just as much as those who lives seem so much better off then yours. I encourage you this Christmas to look for a local church if you are not attending one and introduce yourself to Jesus, he’s waiting to meet you. If you are going to church already and having a ruff time, I encourage you to reach out to your pastoral staff and let them wrap their arms around you and put people in your life that can help. If you are reading this and you know of someone going through a ruff time this Christmas, be an angel in their life and see how you can help make their Christmas one to remember. We can all make a difference in the lives of others if we take a moment to look outside the mirror. Have a blessed holiday.

Taking A Little Time Out To Say Thank You



We have been looking at some interesting subjects the last couple of blogs. I thought it would be nice to take a break and talk about something different . As we sit back this wonderful holiday season most will be meeting with family, filling our stomachs to capacity, and using up the rest of our vacation days for the year. Some will be sweating as they crack open their wallets fighting the crowds this Black Friday. This past weekend we as a nation had the privilege to put work aside, and celebrate our wonderful Thanksgiving Holiday. This has been a hard, hard year for a lot of you reading this. Jobs have been lost, finances have dwindled, health issues have seemed to pop up like weeds, and life in general this year has just seemed ridicules for a lot of people I have had the opportunity walk with. Because of this, I have so many reasons to be thankful to God.


Life has gotten a lot rougher in these last couple of months for me and my family, but as I sit back this holiday I have learned to see God in my hardships and this is where I find myself the most thankful. I praise god because of how he has chosen to bless me with life. Everyday I wake I thank him that he choose to create me. I thank him for giving me a life without disability. Some times we take it for granted that we can walk, talk, smell, eat, move, play, breath, see, and have such freedom physically. I encourage you as you live life throughout this next week to look for those who had the use of their legs, arms, eyes, or speech taken away. I couldn’t imagine how hard life would be with the loss of just one of my senses.

I thank God for the wonderful wife he has blessed me with. Over this last year I have walked with some of friends as they ended their marriages. It is so hard to watch people who were once so in love with one another become bitter enemies. I thank God everyday for blessing me with a sole mate that is so self sacrificing, loving, and fits me so perfect like a glove handmade for my body. I thank God for blessing me with a women who would turn into the mother of my children, a women who lives to love all others above herself. Every day I wake, I roll over and see one of God greatest creations….an angel he decided to place in my household.

I thank God for finding me worthy enough to raise a child in his name. I think at times we take for granted how easy it is to bring a child into this world. Some times I don’t feel worthy enough when I have to watch some of my closest friends trying so hard to have children with no success, and my prayers go out to them. I feel their pain as child baring is so hard for my wife and I. There is no greater feeling in this world then walking through your door after a hard days work and hearing this little voice scream out “DADA with so much joy and excitement. I thank God for a child who is healthy. There are so many families this holiday who had to spend it in a hospital watching there children suffer, not knowing how much longer they would have them in this world. Just the thought of my little boy experiencing this almost brings me to tears. Praise be to God for the healthy little boy I get to put to sleep every night.

I thank god for bring my Mom and two sisters to him and watching them grow in their love for him. My greatest burden in life is for those who haven’t had the opportunity to meet the big guy up stairs. I was raised in a religion that was very blinding to what God is truly about, and these teachings were imbedded in the hearts of my mother and sisters. As this year progressed I watched my two sisters break free from these false doctrines and give there hearts to God. Then I watched my Mom stand up, walk down the isle, and open her heart up to God. It means so much to me to have my family, but having my family with me professing their faith in God is worth more then all the wealth and power of this world.
Lastly, I am thankful that God ripped me out of this world and re-opened my heart for him. I have done so much against him throughout my life, and he choose to forgive me with no strings attached. He gave his son’s life so that I could clean out my closet and it’s skeletons. I thank him for putting his word back in my heart, and showing me how to be a better father, husband, brother, son, and friend. Through out this last year I feel I’ve grown more then ever before, and learned to lean on God unconditionally in faith and obedience. I have learned it doesn’t matter what life throws at you, with God in your life there isn’t a wall you can’t overcome.

I hope you and your family had a wonderful Holiday. I encourage you to take some alone time this weekend and give God some one on one time and let him know how much you appreciate him. He loves you. God bless. Stay tuned we have some of the most important blogs of this year coming up. Blogs that will hopefully change some lives.

Oh No Not Church, You Can't Make Me

Walking With Caution.

We’ve have covered a a lot of different discussions in the last couple blogs, and as basic as they are I hope I have been able to plant a path that you can follow and understand how one can learn how to develop an unbiased one on one relationship with the big man upstairs. Now we come to one of the most uncomfortable subjects you will have to face in your crossroad to God…..CHURCH!!!!!

I want you to understand that in writing this blog I too walked in your shoes, church was new to me and I totally understand what it feels like to hit this subject face on. As you read through my blogs it is obviously clear I am a huge opponent of organized religion, but the oxymoron to this is in reality you need church in order to grow in your walk with God. So here’s my warning: Just because it’s church doesn’t mean it’s right, and not every religion is a true follower of God, even though it carries the title of Christian. This is why I push you so hard to start at the source (the bible) and read about what church looked like as Paul traveled around founding churches throughout the new testament. Take this opportunity to understand what a true Christian church looked like, what they taught, what they did, how the people lived, and what they believed. We have the Corinthian Church, the Galatians Church, the Philippians Church. You read in Timothy what a pastor and deacon looked like and what kind of lives they were to live to hold such a role.

I push this so much because there are thousands of churches out there and I believe only a hand full are governed and structured in adherence to what a biblical church looks like. If you have allowed yourself to build a good biblical foundation, you will allow yourself to see past the charismatic pastor, the greeters, the handshakes, the cards in the mail, and all the fluff that comes with being a new visitor. You will be able to discern what they are teaching and is it biblical, is the church as a whole a godly organization, or just a weekend social club, a house where the congregation and it’s members are Christian on Sunday and worldly on Monday.

I go to a Assembly of God church and I sat back in the distance studying the congregation itself, how they acted towards one another, was their goal to fill seats and collect tithes, or was it centered around the growth of their congregation’s walk with God? Did they push their dogma, their governmental rules, or was their focus on the bible? How did the kids act, and this is important. Were they wild, or could I see God working in their hearts? The bible states you can tell a false prophett by the fruit they bare. A good tree bares good fruit and a bad tree in turns bares bad fruit. The members of a church are the fruit and their pastoral government is the tree. My church is a pretty big church and I was blown away by the overall love of God they haveand the role he played in their every day lives in and out of church. The deal maker for me was watching the youth and seeing so many children and young adult who earnestly loved God and how obedient they were to him when no one was looking, it wasn‘t a fake or a put on. There is no dogma, and every Sunday it’s about the bible and how it fits into our lives.

Can you grow in your relationship with God without church, sure..but I don’t think it can reach the pinnacle it can without putting yourself in front of others with like mind who are there to help that growth, that relationship. What I appreciate is getting to know others who have help me along my spiritual journey and learning what love and friendship is truly about. As humans we can only get so far on our own, but as a team we are unstoppable.

Analyzing What You Will Experience


As I mentioned I’ve been there and your first couple experiences with church are some of the most uncomfortable, and because of this most people will choose not to finish this journey. Lets take a look at my first experience.

It was my wife that took me to my very first church service. As I pulled up I looked and began to feel this overwhelming sense of fear and anxiety in not knowing anyone in this intimidating building that I was going to walk into, how did she talk me into this. As I looked around I couldn’t help to notice my clothing was far to relaxed compared to the majority. As I walked in I am faced with this river of people who all seem to know one another and yet I feel like the outcast. I have to be the only one in this church with a history, and by no means can anyone relate to the hardships my life has faced. As I am taking in this experience I couldn’t help feeling as if I was the only one with imperfections, everyone looked like they had it all in order. I felt like I was the only one in this entire church that was new to this Christian thing.

As I walked around I began to feel like everyone was looking at me, as if they somehow knew the skeletons I had in my closet. I felt like I had this sign on my back that said here walks a sinner. As we took our seats random strangers would come up and shake my hand with a smile that made me feel like fresh meat. My wife would begin to introduce me, and in doing so I felt like there was this spot light following me around. Then it happened: the service began. This music kicked in and everyone jumped up and bam…everyone’s singing. First off, where’s the bass. Then I noticed everyone’s singing with their hands raised, it was different but weird to me.

So I closed my eye’s and slowly and slowly the music began to cause this euphoria in my heart which was something I hadn’t felt before, it was almost like God was there rubbing my back telling me to calm down and enjoy the moment. I found my guard slowly getting lowered, and then I caught myself muttering the words of the songs under my breath. As the sermon started and went on I felt as if he wrote it just for me because everything he was saying seemed to relate to my life. It was the end in seeing the passion the Pastor had and how I learned there were hundreds of others like me in the audience when an alter call happened.

I decided to continue with this church thing and in doing so I realized that church is much like a hospital, when your there you feel like you’re the only one with issues but in reality everyone there is in need of healing in someway, shape, or form. There is no membership required and no commitment needed. Church is what you make of it. It’s your choice on how much or how little you get involved. Church is a different experience and takes time, for me a long time, before it becomes comfortable. In the end I can honestly say it was church that helped me grow in my relationship with God and in life. I have made some of the best relationships I have ever had in my life, and have had more support in my spiritual journey then what I could of done on my own. I hope you to will one day have the opportunity to enjoy God in this manner, and I promise if you really give it a try..beyond one or two visits…you won’t regret it. It may take a couple different visits to different churches, but through prayer and research God will lead you to the church that will be another chapter in you journey with God.

Facing Our Cross Road

So we’ve been taking a look at some random baby steps in trying to understand how one can begin to put their feet on a path in understand where to begin in a relationship with the big guy up stairs. At first we looked at understanding that everyone and I mean everyone reading this has some flaw with in them in some, way, shape, and form and these faults will sometimes stop us from approaching God. We also looked at God through a different set of eye’s throwing aside all the opinions, views, and thoughts we have been fed throughout our lifetime. This blog will be a little longer then norm

When we ended our last blog we looked at taking one of our first steps in opening your heart to God in prayer, and how this is one of the greatest tools we have in growing closer to him. I understand that some reading this are in a cross road in life. Some are standing on a path where in your heart you have tried everything out in life but still feel you are standing at the bottom of a large mountain hindering from you filling that void in your heart that is causing you to read this blog right now.

On the other hand I know some reading this are standing on the other side of this cross road with the desire to know God but intimidated at the thought of where to start and how this will effect your life from this point on. I found that at some point in your spiritual journey you will come face to face with this cross road (refer to  Road Less Traveled). it’s a cross road in which you have to choose what direction your life is going to take. Will you choose to take the road less traveled that Jesus speaks about in Mathew 7:13-14.

This is the hardest part of being a Christian, living outside of the worldly norm. As I read through Mathew the first time and came upon the sermon on the mound I found myself in the center of this cross road. You see I loved sin and everything that came with it. I loved fornication, I loved drinking my weekends away, I loved smoking my cigarettes, I loved my four lettered words, R rated movies….basically I loved what the world as a whole loved, spiritual free accountability. As I continued on in my walk with God I would find myself face to face with my own reflection. I had to learn how to fight my own instinct to sin, I had to fight the temptation of picking and choosing what areas of the bible I would listen to and what areas I would ignore based on what lifestyles I didn’t want to part with

For instance, I was at church every Sunday. The only problem is I was often tired out and maybe a little hung over from the night before. I would find over time I fell into the trap of having two personalities, the Christian Aaron,,,and the Worldly Aaron. Who I was around is who I acted like, in turn I was a spiritual hypocrite. The very person that represents why some of you may have left God, your experience with Christian hypocrisy. I say this because as you grow in your relationship with God you will find times your lifestyle, morals, and belief system will conflict with the world around you, and staying strong and representing God in your actions and choices takes strength, and time to grow this conscience.

It is hard when your friends ask you if you want to partake in something that you know crosses that do not enter zone with God. It’s hard not to say no to that hot chick that you used to fantasize about, who is now in your sight. It’s hard to forgive those that treat you like dirt, loving those that don’t deserve love, it’s hard not renting a movie because it promotes things that you know you wouldn’t watch sitting next to Jesus. Last time I walked around our local movie rental store I couldn’t find one movie on their new release wall that didn’t include foul language, nudity, murder, violence, spiritualism, etc. this world is pretty corrupt as it is, and if they find it to fall under an R rating how bad must it be.

The Christian lifestyle is one of the hardest lifestyles to live because it is a lifestyle and moral system that is ssssssooooo opposite from today’s customs and belief systems. It takes so much discipline and sacrifice in each and every day. It is a lifestyle that goes beyond your outward appearances, it’s a lifestyle that follows you into your privacy and thoughts. As your grow with God you will find you choose this life not for the satisfaction of your religious organization, but because of your love and desire to please God. It’s that love for God that makes it such a desirable life

I found it’s when I was alone that my walk with God was often put to the test. That’s when I found it the hardest to represent him the best, when no one was looking. I have no regrets in choose the spiritual route for it has opened up a new world in which my eye’s were blind to in the past. I owe God so much for opening up my heart to him and helping me to learn who my spiritual father was. My life has changed so much in ways I never thought possible because of my new walk with God. I married the women of my dreams, which was a second chance for me. I am blessed with one of best sons I could ever ask for. I have seen my mother and sisters come to know God in ways I would have never guessed possible. God has blessed me with a wonderful career, and has blessed us in life in measures I don’t deserve. In the end it’s my love and passion for God that I owe him the most for, for it was a void in my heart that I never thought would be filled again.

Next we will look at one of the scariest steps in your walk….CHURCH!!!!!!

Our Next Step: Approaching The Big Guy

I hope you’ve enjoyed our last couple of bloggs as we review some good ways you can start your walk with God or understand a good path to follow. First, we addressed the issue of “I’m not good enough for God”, and how that’s not the case for anyone. Second, we took a peek of who God is, and the myth of him being this mean, domineering, killer. The hard part of writing you is I’m trying to shrink down to one page what would seriously take many bloggs to cover. That’s why you will hear me push you to picking up the bible on your own, opening up at the book of Matthew, and begin learning on God because things will make far more sense in the long run.

Today I want to look at the third part of this journey…..Prayer. Now I know for some this subject can be weird and intimidating. For one, some of you out there may not know what prayer is, or how to go about doing so. Some of you reading this may have been trained to recite choreographed prayers, like those with Catholic backgrounds. I mean let’s be honest, the thought of sitting in a room by yourself speaking to someone you can’t see or hear is out of the norm. Some would say it time for the jacket with the little locks and straps on it (just kidding).

Prayer to me is one of the most intimate forms of worship with God. It’s your time to open up your heart to God and let him know what’s going on in your life, what struggles you’re facing, how much you love him, what questions you have, or anything else your heart desires. Prayer has no manual to it; there is no proper formation other then the Amen ending. It’s just you, your words, and God.

In the beginning I was hesitant of this because I just felt weird. As I progressed in my studies of God and I would see Jesus’ relationship with God and how he would pour his hear out to him, sometimes in tears, and one day I decided to take that next step. I sat on my bed and just started talking to God. I told him I enjoy my reading but wasn’t sure how to apply it to my life and if he was up there could he help me out.

As time went on I would begin to pray often to him, asking for further knowledge, advice on life, or sometimes I would just plain out vent about life and its hardships. The truth is this is your journey, this is you relationship with God. You take your time, but I promise you when you open your heart up to God and begin to let him into your intimate thoughts and hardships, joys and pains, you will begin to feel his presence in your life. God is an intimate God and acts like a real father. Fathers love when their children come to them and let them into their lives, and seek their advice. I encourage you to buy a small notebook and begin to create a prayer journal. Write down your conversations with God, and once a month go back and look over it. After a while you will begin to see these prayers come true, and that’s where your relationship with God becomes real.

The two most important parts of this journey are learning about God through his word, and opening your heart up to him in prayer. Everything else evolves around these two. God doesn’t care about anything else in this world except his relationship with you. Going to church, participating in ministries, attending bible studies, preaching his word, helping the sick, feeding the needy, paying tithes, all of this is there to help compliment your walk with God and help you grow in spiritual maturity.

Everyone’s different and everyone’s journey works differently. Some people will pick up a bible, begin to pray for forgiveness, jump right into church, and have everything going for them like it’s nothing. For others like me it’s a slow, long journey with many obstacles and traps along the way. I had to do a lot of spiritual house cleaning. I had a lot of bumps in the road when it came to choices, belief systems, and so much more before I even became comfortable with the notion of God in my life. I’m still not where I would like to be in my walk with God.

One thing I can say is prayer has helped me in ways you have to experience on your own. The best part about prayer is God’s ear is open 24/7, 365 days of the year. I encourage you tonight as you are preparing for bed, approach God and let him know where you are in life and what you are seeking from him. Let him know the questions in your life and why you’ve been so hesitant in coming to him. Remember God knows what’s already in your heart whether you make it vocal or not so don’t censure your prayers, let it out.

I appreciate you taking the time to read this blog and next week we will look at the future obstacles you face as you grow in your walk with God. We will look at why walking with God is so hard in our day. God Bless.

Unveiling The Myth About God

If your were to Google the word “God” you would find millions of hits. If you were to go out ask asked people their interpretation of God you probably wouldn’t come across the same answer twice. What’s sad is in Christianity you can't even find one faith that can come into agreement with an answer. The truth is the idea of God, and who he is, has become so warped and blurred that most people have been living off of the opinions of others for so long, that who he really is has disappeared in the shadows of interpretation.

When I first became curious about God I felt so confused because I was raised with a certain belief system (as I think we all are in some way), and everywhere I turned there were different opinions. I mean how can a person with no biblical background even begin to figure this out. In religion I think the image of God has been changed to create fear as if he is this hard core killer who lives to seek out and destroy those who live lives opposite of his plan for mankind. Even today I have a hard time watching televangelist because their messages are so blunt and paint a message of hell fire and brimstone….CONVERT OR FACE THE MIGHTY WRATH OF GOD….COME TO CHURCH OR BURN AS A PIECE OF BACON THE HELLS FRYING PAN.

Okay I may have gone a little over board but I think for the majority of society this is how the messages seem to come across. For some it’s how this world has turned out and the pain and suffering we see every day, in their present life and worldwide, that has painted a picture of a God that doesn’t care anymore. I know for a close friend of mine this is one reason he has a hard time believing in God. You know what I did, I began my spiritual journey taking all of the opinions of my past, the interpretations of the present, and decided to go to the source myself. I asked the pastor of the church I was starting to attend for an easy to understand bible that would help me learn, and bought my first study bible. So I will challenge you to take what I say as my perception of my biblical reading and go to the source of God yourself and read about him in his Bible. Don’t lean on my words, but read the words of God yourself.

It’s the simplest thought…every opinion…all Christian faiths…every Christian belief system…all…comes…from…one book…the bible………the source of everything, they all argue from the same manual. It’s like cutting out the middle man and going directly to the manufacturer. I will tell you when I began at the book of Mathew and began to read about Jesus myself I felt like I had found the greatest treasure on Earth. I was finally learning on my own the true personality of Christ and who his father in Heaven really was, and why this Earth is the way it is, and what the future really looks like.

I came to see that God is like a father who has a planet full of children who have been kidnapped, blindfolded, and taught to believe that he is a figment of their imagination. I came to see that he yearns in the worst way for his children to re-kindle a relationship with him, and has done so much though out the millenniums to do so. He sits up in heaven hoping someday his children will fall back in love with him, talk to him, and learn who he is. I came to learn that God isn’t this crazy sword wielding killer that I thought he was, but in fact the total opposite. I came to read that God is one of the most forgiving, loving , understand, patient, long suffering, loyal, friend, father, and advocate anyone could ever hope for in life.


He would go on to sacrifice his son so an earth that would grow up to live totally opposite of what he desires, refuse to believe in him, and totally reject his ways, could have a never ending chance for a reward that surpasses winning 100,000,000 lotteries. I came to read about a God who understands us better then our parents, best friends, doctors, psychologists, even ourselves and wants to bless us beyond belief. I would also read about an enemy of God we call Satan whose goal is to turn all of mankind from God and is craftier then the best mastermind in the history of the world. He would be a nemesis that never sleeps, never gives up. He can shape the way our hearts thinks, control our desires, and turn our strengths into weaknesses with tricks and tactics we often become blind to.

He would go onto give mankind every wicked thing it desired and over time this world would become numb to God’s ways and grow cold to his word. Even so, even with a world as corrupt as ours, and with inhabitants that continuously defy him…he refuses to stop loving us. He loves every bad child, every reject, every sinner, every drug addict, every homosexual, every murder, every person in prison, and every person of this world no matter how negative this world may look upon them. This is because in his eye’s all of his children are worth his forgiveness and all his children of this world he seeks to have a relationship with. Like a father the thought of loosing any of his children to hell is an unfathomable thought to God To sum it up I guess I came to learn that no matter how bad this world gets, how good or bad my life may be, or how many times I mess up in life, I can wake up happy ever morning knowing that God will always be there for me and he will never give up on me. GOD IS LOVE.

Where do I begin?

For many reading this blog the whole idea of who God is, what the bible is really about, and what it means to have a relationship with him is a subject that is not to well known. Everyone has heard theories about God, the bible, and most have experienced religion in some way shape or form. Most have walked into a church at some point in their lives, maybe for a wedding, or funeral. Some of you reading this may have even been raised in a church or religious organization at some point in your life.

The truth is most have had a touch point in their live with God, but in truth not many people today have an understanding of who God really is, or what’s even in the bible. There was a poll not to long ago that asked 32 questions on religion and , “the outcome showed nearly 6 out of 10 ranked religion “very important”, but only 4 out 10 said they attended worship services at least once a week” Article on poll

In this generation church has kind of lost its flare and less and less families are incorporating biblical teachings into their family structure. In turn, more and more generations are growing up with the notion that there may be a God and a book called the bible that has some teachings about him, and people go to Churches to listen to sermons about him. So it is easy to understand why more and more people find it intimidating to attend church and why many have no idea where to start when it comes to learning about God.

If you can relate to this then I want to dedicate these next couple of blogs to you, with no strings attached. I promise you there will be no hell fire and brim stone speeches, no suggestions on religious organizations to join, and nothing to cast judgment on you. I’ve come to an understanding that there are thousands of blogs, internet pages, televangelists, books, parents, relatives, friends, neighbors, and everything and everyone else out there that are proud to show us how imperfect we are and how we are all on the expressway to Hell. No, my purpose is to help you understand how one could begin, baby step wise, a slow and steady relationship with God and how to decipher this intimidating thousand plus page book we call the bible.In other words where do I begin if I were curious about God.

No One Is Perfect

Before we can begin I want to put out this disclaimer because I know it’s one of the biggest things that keep our heart closed to the notion of even coming near God. It’s the feeling that we are to messed up for God to ever open his heart to us. It’s the thought that your past, present, or both is so messed up…your past actions, thoughts, acts, mistakes, are so terrible that in no way, shape, or form will God ever…ever….ever…think about letting you near him. You may think that your current lifestyle is so twisted, and mangled with decisions of destruction you make consistently: whether it be addictions to drugs or sex, relationship choices, mistakes you choose to continuously make, lifestyle choices you feel are corrupt, associations you may be apart of, or actions you partake in that you know are totally messed up. I want you to know that no matter how many skeletons you have in your closet, whether in the past, present, or future…you can never be to messed up to approach God, even if this is your umpteenth attempt.

I give you one great example…the Apostle Paul, previously know as Saul the Sanhedrin Killer. He was like a Jewish version of Hitler. Serious, he was killing thousands of Jews…men, women, and children who decided to convert from Jewish teachings to Christianity. He actually put the hit out on the Apostle Stephen (one of the founding 12 apostles). Did you know he would go on to write 2/3 of the New Testament, which starts at the birth of Jesus to Revelation that last book in the bible. God would choose him to spread the gospel to all the gentiles (non-Jews) on his behalf throughout the world.

The one thing that I pray you will come to see is no one starts this process already clean with their life in order, are you kidding me. Most Christians today still have plenty of baggage their looking to dispose of. I mean were all still imperfect human beings, no matter where you’re at with God. What I hope you will comes to find is the process of coming to know God somehow influences the soul to change, and sometimes you don’t even notice it happening. Just know that God is stoked at the fact you’re even stirring the thought of him in your brain. You will come to see that most of the myths behind him and the bible is a lot different, and in the end God is more loving and forgiving then you could have ever imagined. Next week we’ll look at the first step…who is God.